War With Trent – or – Why I Feel Like A Horrible Parent
First off, I will start this post by saying that I have a terrible flaw in that I am indecisive and sort of a major push over. Not a good combination when it comes to parenting.
That said, today I took the kids to a play date. We were the only ones to show, but it was still a really nice time since the host has twins Trent’s age. It got to be time for them to eat their lunch and I asked her how she got her kids to eat vegetables, since Trent eats none. She told me how her one kid won’t eat any veggies, but the other one is pretty good about it. She has a system where she brings out the the veggies first. When the kids finish that, she brings out the meat. Once they eat the meat then she brings out the starch.
I watched her bring out the veggies and the kids just ate it. I resolved that I would try this method for our own lunch time once I got home. We drove back and I set Trent up at the dining room table and made him a small amount of corn. My plan was to give him a PB&J after he ate it. Instead he refused to eat any corn at all, not even to try it. I then decided to dig my heels in! He wasn’t going to get another course until he ate some corn! Finally he said he was done. So I figured we should stop fighting over the stupid corn and go try and take a nap.
Nap time was another disaster, which is a story in and of itself. Suffice it to say, I was determined to continue with my experiment again at dinner time and right on to the next day for breakfast and lunch if need be. I knew it was going to be very difficult, but I was feeling very adamant when Garrick got home and told him of my plan. He agreed.
Dinner time rolled around and I again presented the corn, much to Trent’s dismay. I also gave him a plate of the dinner Garrick and I were eating, a pasta bake which came out pretty good. He wouldn’t touch any of it and dinner dissolved into a mess of crying, screaming and tantrums; the magnitude of which Trent had never before reached. Thank goodness Hunter was being so good during all of this.
By this point I was starting to second guess myself. Should I just buckle and let Trent eat something he likes, cereal maybe? Or should I stick to my guns? Garrick made the decision for me, saying it was time for some tough love since we have been letting Trent have his way for so long. The entire night was then Trent screaming. I was cleaning the kitchen listening to him in his room calling for me. By this point I had totally cracked, but Garrick was standing firm on the issue now. I even came up with the suggestion of just offering the same vegetable with every meal in hopes that Trent will try it, but that didn’t fly with him. I was also thinking to myself that maybe we should just go back to the way were doing it before, presenting him with food, and making sure there is at least one thing that he likes on the plate.
Now I felt really awful. And stupid. All because I was so enchanted by two kids sitting nicely eating vegetables at lunch time. Poor Trent couldn’t control himself after not having lunch or dinner in addition to being tired from no nap. I don’t want Trent to have melt downs and tantrums, but I don’t want to let him walk all over me either. No one ever said parenting would be easy…
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